The thing that everyone warned me would happen finally did. One month after returning to work, my milk supply has taken a SUDDEN nose dive — and it literally happened this past weekend. When I say sudden, I mean up to Thursday of last week I was still pumping plenty of breast milk at work and literally clawing at the door to escape meetings every 2 ½ -3 hours so I can pump. My boobies would be in pain! And then Saturday rolled around and little Miss Annabelle started to get fussy on the boob. More like, she’d grunt and groan out of frustration, or at least that’s how it sounded. And instead of nursing for about 10 minutes on each side and popping off when she’s done, she’d literally hang on for dear life, gnawing away on my nips. For like, ever. Suck, suck, suuuuuuck. *groan*
Usually I’m just watching TV or Facebook stalking while nursing, and before I know it, Annie B. is all done. But on Saturday, I noticed as she was nursing that she was literally thrashing around, kicking her legs and twisting her head in different directions tying to fight that damn breast milk out of mommy.
Oh why doesn’t someone just rip my heart out right now. I never want to see my baby struggle – especially when it’s something that I’ve been able to provide for my little one so lovingly – and at times – painstakingly, for nearly 5 months. I survived ridiculously sore, cracked nipples, and the mind numbing pain associated with Vasospasm, in which I took Vitamin B6, hypertension medicine, and walked around with heat warmers AND wool breast pads stuffed in my bra for weeks and weeks in an attempt to cure my pain. But miraculously, at 12 weeks, all the pain just washed away. Nursing became a very pleasant experience. And even when I had cold chills shooting from my head to my toes due to pain, I always loved breastfeeding. No, I’m not a masochist, but my baby loved it, so I loved it. My favorite thing each day is scooping little Annabelle up and having our mommy/baby bonding time nursing. It’s the best.
So what happened? Why the sudden drop? Well, maybe it took about a month for my body to notice I’m not nursing as much as I used to since returning to work. I don’t know, but I’m back to having to supplement with formula. It’s funny how when you have a newborn and your milk hasn’t come in yet, you have to supplement with formula so your baby doesn’t wittle away to nothing. And then your milk comes in and you’re a one woman milk machine for months on end. And suddenly, you’re back to square one again, supplementing. It makes me sad.
Do I dry up or fight the drought?
Now I’m conflicted on what to do about this. Do I let nature take its course and let my supply drop little by little until I’m all dried up? Or do I start taking supplements and drink teas intended to increase my milk supply? I always said my goal for nursing was 6 months, and when I was in all that pain I said I’d be lucky to make it to 3 months. But now that I’ve made it through the dark time of nursing and it’s pain free and comforting to both my baby AND me, why stop now?
Welllll….I’ve been having anxiety over an upcoming out of town bachelorette party in January in which I’m going to be gone for 3 ½ days from Annabelle. What am I suppose to do about breastfeeding while I’m gone, pump and dump 5 times a day? YUCK! ANNOYING! That shit is like liquid gold, it would be heartbreaking to throw it out! But then again, how would I get it home? And to be honest, it’ll probably be laced with alcohol being a bachelorette weekend anyway! Weaning your breastfed baby because you have a bachelorette party to go to sounds so lame and selfish, but that’s not why I’d want to wean. I don’t particularly want to wean right now anyway. But I can’t nurse forever. At some point I have to stop. But I wanted to stop because Annabelle lost interest. I didn’t want to lose my ability to provide what she wants and needs before she’s ready…. I don’t want to see her struggle for that familiar place where she’s tucked into my arm and nursing away, nuzzled in and happy as a clam.
Annnnnd now I’m mourning my breastfeeding days while I’m still breastfeeding. I can’t even imagine the days where Annabelle eats from a bottle all day and I never get to nurse her to sleep again. It literally makes me want to cry because I’m so attached to her. Help, I need advice!
Any advice from breastfeeding moms? What causes a sudden drop in supply?
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{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }
My LO is 14 weeks old, and I’ve been back to work for three. His pediatrician warned me that my supply would drop once I went back to work, but that it would recover, so not to worry. I haven’t seen a huge nosedive yet, but I definitely get less from pumping sessions. I’m already stressed that I’m not pumping as much as he eats some days.
Not terribly helpful, I know, but I wanted to at least chime in. Good luck to you and AB!
Courtney, once you start pumping that is really the beginning of the end of nursing. Your body just automatically sees this as the weaning process and slowly your milk supply starts to dwindle. It happened to me…I was fine until I went back to work…and like you I pumped at work…took the milk home.
When you’re nursing…you are usually doing that quite frequently – maybe every few hours or so. When you stop that process plus supplement with your breastmilk, your body automatically starts to shut down those functions of producing as much milk…and for a lot of women that is the best weining process (your body knows this).
It’s sad if you’re not ready to quit – but what do you do? When you’re working, you can’t do both. Just pat yourself on the back that you were awesome in giving her the best of 5-6 months. I’m proud of you for being such a great mommy and I know Annabelle will really appreciate that. I love the fact that you’ve been so prepared in each endeavor of mommyhood.
Love, Mom
Thanks for sharing your pain, Diana! Misery loves company.
I shouldn’t say it’s a huge nosedive, but it’s definitely less than I used to get, where I no longer feel like I can drop and feed AB any time during the day and there will be SOMETHING there. I now feel like even 3 hours isn’t enough time to rebound and have enough milk in me since the last feeding. I used to sometimes feed her a couple times between naps every 2 hours….those days are gone! I feel bad for little AB. She’s probably wondering where all her milk went. 
Hey Courtney-
So with my first I went back to work after 12 weeks. We took a vacation with the baby and a sitter right before returning and Kaylin decided on that trip she loved the bottle. So when I went back to work she weaned herself off me! I was devasted. Pissed actually at first and hurt. But I still pumped 4x day and got plenty until I wanted to quit which was 4 months after she refused to feed off me.
Second baby loved the boob and I breastfed her till 10mo. My supply went down a little when I started work but still enough to keep her happy and build my stock. She literally sucked me dry come 10 months and I was forced to stop pumping and feeding. I didn’t even get engorged after I stopped she sucked me so dry…which I highly recommend. getting enorged when you stop sucks.
We had taken a couple 4 days trips during those 10 months, and I was sure she would not feed after…she did!
Moral of the story…each baby is different and each mommy’s supply is different. My first had no interest after 12 weeks and my second couldnt get enough. Some mom’s can’t even feed. So be happy your baby got 5 good months off you!
I always pumped while away. Bring a cooler. Milk is good for 3-4 days before needing to be frozen. I always pumped and kept the milk in baggies in a fridge. Even in a cabin we shared with 20 other people on a boat trip!
Def. try and drink lots of water and be sure you are eating good to best keep up your supply as much as possible!
You can still have that mommy daughter time while bottle feeding. I love kissing my lil nugget on the forehead while she holds her bottle before bed! Its still special whether through the boob or bottle!
I think workouts have something to do with supply as well. If you have been hitting the gym hard, that probably has affected the supply. Your workouts have taken some of the calories your body needed for production. That’s me personal threory. So water…lots of water!
Thanks for the tips, Stephanie. I’d rather Annabelle decide she’s ready to wean, then me have to wean because I’m not producing as much. Over the holidays though, I’ve noticed my supply has boosted a bit, or at least I think, because she no longer seems dissatisfied during a feeding. It’s probably b/c I’ve been on vacay and nursing her for every feeding, so my body is responding to the demand. But ya, I think no matter what, I’ll be sad to no longer be nursing, whether she weans or I have to eventually. It’s such a tight bond we have and it makes me sad for the day where we no longer do that.
Now I understand why some women BF for so freaking long! (It’s probably just as much for the mom as it is for the baby!)
I’m nervous about my trip this month where I’ll be gone for 4 days. Pumping five times a day seems unrealistic because we’ll be out and about. I’m thinking of purchasing two handheld pumps so I can run to the bathroom and do it vs. lugging my big electric pump all over town! Annoying! I fear this trip will make my b-milk tank big time. I hope not and that my body will respond to the demand when I get home. Part of me just wants to cancel my trip b/c it’ll be easier to just not go. But I do need to have a life and return the favor to friends who have come to MY wedding AND baby showers. Plus, we’ll have a lot of fun. If only this pumping sitch wasn’t giving me so much anxiety. Hmph.
Ugh, I’m right there with you and trying to “fight the drought” myself. I heard that pumping in the middle of the night during peak breast milk production hours (between 2 am – 5 am) helps stimulate more milk production. Since my baby is sleeping through the night (and I assume yours is, too), I’ve had to set my alarm clock for 3:00 am each night. I think it’s helped me produce more throughout the work day. Hope this helps. Good luck!
That’s interesting, I hadn’t heard that pumping in the middle of the night would boost milk production. Glad it’s helping you! Ugh though, I hate the idea of getting up at 3am to pump! I can see myself staring at the clock knowing my alarm is going to go off in 2 1/2 hours for work! *cringing* just thinking about it. ALTHOUGH, I’m trying to figure out how I’m going to store up enough breastmilk for Annabelle to drink while I go on a 3 day girl’s trip, so this might be a good way to do that! Thanks, TalkingThirty!
What did you end up doing? Supply takes a drop when you return to work, but supplementing with formula has provided by son and me a happy medium. Baby has the benefits of breastmilk and I don’t have to feel overwhelmed by trying to get my supply up while working.
Ya, I’ve supplemented with formula. I’m able to pump around 10-12 oz per day at work and then I pump before I go to bed at 11 so I can send her to daycare with 15 oz of bmilk (3 5oz bottles) a day. They usually end up giving her 2-4 oz of formula at the end of the day if she’s still hungry. I’m starting to introduce solids into her diet, so hopefully that’ll help fill her tummy a bit more during the day.